


Go Back to Sleep

by skeletiddies



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Drabble, General Fic, I suppose, Jokes, Other, i mean its short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-29 14:01:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5130284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skeletiddies/pseuds/skeletiddies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sans can just never resist the temptation to disrupt your sleep with awful jokes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Go Back to Sleep

**Author's Note:**

> i saw this one person send a concept to kyleehenke's blog about sans waking the reader up, telling a bad joke and realising it wasnt as good as he thought  
> i laughed rly hard at it so i decided to write it quickly
> 
> i had to google really bad jokes bc im hilarious and all my jokes are genuinely funny

“Hey, psst, kiddo—wake up.”

You groaned and turned over, your back now facing him.

Sans shook you a little more. “Come on, come on, this is really good, I just thought of a really funny joke- you have to hear it.”

You groaned again, a little louder to signify that you were too tired to listen to his bullshittery right now. “Sans, go back to sleep.”

“It’s really good, though.”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

And with that, you folded your pillow over the side of your head and forced his voice out of your mind.

“Come on! Don’t be like that! You’ll enjoy it, you’ll be totally ecstatic that I woke you up for this, I promise!”

“Uh-uh.”

He heaved a sigh and tugged the pillow out from under your head, making you grunt in displeasure. Why was it always like this with him? Why did he always feel the need to wake you up with this nonsense? You couldn’t remember the last time you actually managed to get to sleep and _stay_ asleep ever since making this thing you had with Sans official.

“Hey, look, if you listen to my joke I’ll go down on you,” he said.

That intrigued you. You rolled over and looked up at him as he sat upright in the bed. “You have my attention. Proceed.”

He knew that’d convince you. His smile grew as he began his joke. “Alright. What’s the difference between the bird flu and the swine flu?”

Oh no. 

Daring yourself further, reminding yourself that oral sex was at the end of this dark tunnel, you answered, “I don’t know, Sans. What is the difference between the bird flu and swine flu?”

If he smile got any wider than it was at that moment, it may just break his whole skull in half. “If you have bird flu, you need _tweetment._ But if you have swine flu you need _oink-ment._ ”

You stared at him, silently. You weren’t sure how to say this, but you felt like he didn’t know.

“Sans…” you breathed, slowly, calmly. “People died.”

His expression dropped. “Fuck. They did?”

You nodded.

He sat back against the headboard and sighed. “Well… shit. That’s a buzzkill. I feel really bad now.” He looked down at you. “Are you… sure people died?”

You deadpanned. He ran a hand over his skull sheepishly. Now this was just awkward. He thought he was being clever. This… was not what he intended for a fun joke.

You cleared your throat and shuffled slightly closer to him. “Well then, not to change the subject, but you promised that you’d…” His imagination would finish the rest of the sentence for you.

Now it was Sans’ turn to make you feel bad. “You’re really asking about that at a time like this? People died. Can’t you see I’m torn up about this? Oh man, that really ruined my night. I’m so sad right now.”

Your brows furrowed downwards. “You woke me up and said you’d go down—ugh!” You groaned. You knew there’d be no getting through to him. You couldn’t believe he had the gall to wake you up with the false promise of sex, tell a bad joke then get out of it by saying he felt bad that his joke was so awful.

He wasn’t even listening to your complaints, he was off in his own little world, muttering about how the joke sounded better in his head, before he found out that those diseases actually claimed lives. 

“Aw… that was really bad…” he mumbled as he lowered himself down into the sheets. His trademark grin was replaced with a pained grimace as he turned his back to you. This guy really liked screwing you around, didn't he? Not in the fun way, either. You supposed that’s what you got when you dated someone as painfully lazy as him.

“Sans--”

But it was too late. Sans had already fallen asleep, and in the saddest way possible. You felt depressed just watching him. How was it even possible to make sleeping look emotional? You had no idea, but he managed somehow.

And, seeing how the world truly hated you, you couldn’t get back to sleep that whole damn night. You spent the remainder of the evening just staring at his back, occasionally attempting to wake him up – but of course to no avail. So instead, you gazed at the ceiling and wallowed in your own self-pity and inability to get the rest you so dearly needed.

All because of Sans’ shitty jokes.


End file.
